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EP. 140 The 3 Most Powerful Tools in Healthy Relationships


To View the Video on YouTube: https://youtu.be/8UtE_GD0YLY


SHOW NOTES


Welcome to a new week of the Hope Rescue Podcast. This week we are continuing our discussion on finding your voice in your relationships. Tim and Kimberly share 3 of the most powerful tools you can use for healthy relationships. Keep reading to discover what they are.


James 1:19 says, "Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.” Tim starts by clarifying that in this text, James is not talking about relationships, he's talking about a relationship that the believer has with the Word of God. The context is about hearing the Word of God and understanding Biblical Truth. However, these principles can also be applied to relationships.

The three principles are:

1. Be quick to hear

2. Be slow to speak

3. Be slow to anger.


Being quick to hear means we are ready and prepared to listen. When we are quick to hear we are willing to hear even things we need to correct in our own lives. Our world would be a different place if we were all quick to hear instead of shouting our opinions from the rooftops. Being quick to hear essentially says, “I care about what you have to say.”


We are also called to be slow to speak. If we are quick to speak, we likely are not listening well. In your relationship, what do you want from your spouse? Do you want him or her to listen better? Or do you want him or her to hear you out instead of interrupting before you finish your thought? Communicate this to your spouse instead of turning silent.


Lastly, we are called to be slow to anger. When we are quick to anger it's often because we aren’t seeing the person’s heart, but we only see their behavior. Second Corinthians 5:16-17 says, “From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” Earlier in the text it talks about seeing people's hearts instead of their outside appearance. If we could see people's hearts instead of just their behavior, we would be slower to anger. When we seek to understand people's hearts behind their behavior, we're quicker to offer grace. When we look at the heart of a person and realize they are an eternal person, it changes the way we react to their behavior.


Four things that your voice is


Your voice is a mutual contribution to the relationship. Contribution is equivalent to communication.

Your voice is your self-respect. Without a voice, you withdraw, isolate, and you feel less-than. We all have been given an assignment from the Lord, and we cannot fulfill our assignments without our voices.

Your voice acts as your boundaries. When you use your voice, you can say what encroaches on your boundaries.

Your voice is your opinions and your ideas. When you have your voice, you feel free to share your opinions with others.


Things Your Voice Should Not be Used For


Your voice should not be used as a tool for dominance in your relationships.

Your voice should not be used to control others.

Your voice should not be used without interdependency. Your voice should not be so strong that you don’t need anyone else.


Join us next week as we wrap up our series on finding your voice in your relationships.


QUOTES


“Our world would be a different place if we were all quick to hear instead of shouting our opinions from the rooftops.” -Kimberly


“When we seek to understand people's hearts behind their behavior, we're quicker to offer grace.” -Tim


“We all have been given an assignment from the Lord, and we cannot fulfill our assignments without our voices.” -Kimberly


REFERENCED SCRIPTURE


James 1:19 "Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger”


2 Corinthians 5:16-17 “From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.”


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