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EP. 108 Should Wives Submit to their Husbands?


To View the Video on YouTube: https://youtu.be/Z5jzQTFetak


SHOW NOTES


Welcome to a new week of the Hope Rescue Podcast. This week we are wrapping up our series discussing the four essential principles to a healthy relationship. We are talking about relationships like marriage, parenting, friendships, and even with employees and coworkers. Last week we discussed in-depth the third principle: gratitude. Keep reading to hear this week’s discussion.


Tim and Kimberly pull their essential principles to a healthy relationship from Ephesians 5:18-20 which says, "Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.” The four essential principles to a healthy relationship are:


1. Communication

2. Rejoicing

3. Gratitude

4. Mutual Submission


Last week we discussed gratitude, but this week we are going to talk about mutual submission. Kimberly kicks off the conversation talking about how many women are triggered by the word “submission” because it has possibly been used as a way of abuse in a past relationship. After 13 years in a toxic and abusive relationship with her ex-husband, Kimberly knows how to speak sensitively on the topic of submission. She emphasizes that the type of submission her and Tim are talking about is a mutual submission for one another; they are not talking about one person submitting and the other person controlling. That is abuse.


1 Corinthians 13:4-7 says, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” Love is not rude. Love doesn't seek itself. Love is not easily angered. Love keeps no record of wrongdoings.


Tim explains that the old-school view and teaching of submission was an inaccurate understanding of scripture. When we think of scripture telling women to submit to their husbands, we often think of Ephesians 5:22:24 which says, “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.” Tim explains that Jesus Christ did not become the head of the Church before sacrificing it all. Through His death on the cross, His resurrection, the pouring out of His Spirit, and His ascension to the Father, Jesus became the head of the Church. Tim explains that men cannot be the head of their homes without sacrifice. Headship is responsibility, not power. The man’s responsibility is to meet the needs of his wife, as Jesus’s responsibility was the salvation of the church.


The word “submit” in Ephesians 5:22 does not mean to obey. Hupotassō is the greek word used in verse 22, and the same word is used over three dozen times in the New Testament. Hupotassō literally means to “line up under.” Wives are to submit their needs to the care of their husbands. Husbands are called to meet the needs of their wives. Some men believe their wives are to obey them like children are called to obey their parents, but that is an incredible misunderstanding. Marriage is all about intimacy with one another, and trying to overpower our spouses will only cause division.


Mutual submission should be the goal in our marriages. We should seek to serve and meet the needs of our spouses. It should be our joy to serve and submit to our spouses. When we mutually submit to one another, we create a win-win environment. When one person wants to control and force their spouse to submit to him or her, only one person wins.


When we are connected to our spouse and not in competition, we fight to serve him or her. When connection is the goal, we naturally want to serve others. We give out of love without worrying about what we will receive in return.


Join us next week as we start discussing a new topic. We love you all and are thankful for your support!


REFERENCED SCRIPTURE


Ephesians 5:18-20 "Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.”


1 Corinthians 13:4-7 “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”


Ephesians 5:22-27 “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.”



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